Saturday, October 01, 2005

Surely There Exists A Parallel Universe

Because I know this doesn’t happen in the world I live in. I know parents don’t encourage youngsters to practice stacking and unstacking regulation-sized cups, and then attend massive conventions packed with others who have done the same.

This is perhaps the most simultaneously impressive and unimpressive thing I have seen in my entire life. If you didn’t click on that link, seriously, do it. You will be amazed as well as chilled to your very soul.

That is a link from Superhandz, an overdesigned, vaguely Satanic website devoted to “hand sports,” which, improbably enough, is not a euphemism for masturbation. Hand sports are basically parlor tricks based on manual dexterity elevated (or degraded, if you will) to the level of pseudo-extreme-sport through the excessive use of Zs and Xs. (Want to take up such sports? Then the X-treme Beginnerz DVD is for you.) These sports include pen-spinning, card manipulation, and cup stacking.

Cup stacking has been renamed “sport stacking” by the World Cup Stacking Association, which presumably changed the name of their organization shortly thereafter. By the way, pretty soon I’m going to start calling TV watching “sport watching.” “Sport sitting” is also acceptable. Also “sport reading.” “Sport blogging.” I am going to be a major athlete, so watch out, world.


Sarah said...

That is incredible and... so dumb. Damn.

C said...

it most definitely cannot exist in our world.